This guide will help you answer 2.3 Describe ways to approach children and young people when it is suspected that they have selfharmed.
Knowing how to approach children and young people when you suspect they have self-harmed is essential. Creating a safe and supportive environment encourages open communication and helps them feel understood and cared for.
Building Trust
Establish a Safe Space
Children and young people need to feel secure before they talk about self-harm. Choose a private, quiet place to have the conversation. Ensure there are no distractions. This will help them feel at ease.
Show Empathy and Respect
Approach the situation with empathy. Acknowledge their feelings and experiences. Use a calm and gentle tone. Avoid being judgemental, which could make them feel isolated.
Be Patient
Young people may hesitate to open up. Let them take their time. Avoid rushing them to talk or finish their sentences. Patience shows you value their thoughts and feelings.
Communication Techniques
Active Listening
- Give Them Full Attention: Put away mobile phones and avoid interruptions.
- Nod and Use Encouraging Words: This shows you are engaged and listening carefully.
- Reflect Back What They Say: This involves repeating back key points to show understanding. For example, “It sounds like you’re feeling overwhelmed.”
Open-Ended Questions
Ask questions that invite more than a yes or no answer. This encourages them to express their feelings.
- How are you feeling today?
- Can you tell me what’s been going on?
- What were you thinking about when it happened?
Avoid Direct Accusations
Instead of saying, “You have been self-harming, haven’t you?” try framing it gently: “I have noticed some things and I’m worried about you.”
Providing Support
Reassure Them
Let them know they are not alone. Tell them they did the right thing by talking to someone. Reinforce that support is available for them.
Discuss Coping Mechanisms
Begin to explore healthier ways to cope with their feelings. Suggest activities like drawing, writing, or exercising. Make it clear these are options, not instructions.
Encourage Professional Help
Gently suggest speaking to a counsellor or therapist. Offer to help them find resources or accompany them to appointments if they wish.
Maintaining Confidentiality
Explain Limits
Let them know their information is private, but you might need to share it with someone who can help. This is especially true if they are in immediate danger.
Keep Them Involved
If you need to share information, involve them in the process. Explain who you will tell and why. This maintains trust and transparency.
Being Prepared
Training and Resources
Ensure you are familiar with signs of self-harm and know who to contact for further advice. Access training materials and resources to expand your knowledge.
Have Emergency Contacts
Know who to contact in a crisis. This might include healthcare professionals or mental health services.
Reflecting on Your Approach
Assess Your Own Feelings
Consider your own emotions before the conversation. Being calm and centred will help you provide better support.
Seek Guidance
After the discussion, reflect on what went well and where you can improve. Consider discussing your experience with a supervisor or colleague for additional perspectives.
Final Thoughts
Approaching children and young people suspected of self-harming requires sensitivity and care. The focus should be on building trust, encouraging open communication, and providing the right support. By creating a safe space and listening actively, you can help them feel understood and guide them towards appropriate help.
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