3.5. Explain how to support children or young people to recognise and take action when they are involved in abusive or exploitative relationships

This guide will help you answer 3.5. Explain how to support children or young people to recognise and take action when they are involved in abusive or exploitative relationships.

Helping children and young people identify abusive or exploitative relationships is an essential task. It involves raising awareness, providing clear guidance, and creating a safe environment for them to take action. In this guide, we will cover practical ways to support them effectively.

What Is an Abusive or Exploitative Relationship?

An abusive relationship involves one person using power or control over another. Abuse can be physical, emotional, sexual, or financial. Exploitation means taking advantage of someone, often for personal gain. Examples include forcing someone to engage in illegal activities, such as selling drugs, or manipulating them into giving away their money or personal belongings.

Recognising abuse or exploitation is not always easy. Abusers often use manipulation to make their behaviour seem acceptable. Young people may feel confused, scared, or even blame themselves for what is happening.

Signs of Abusive or Exploitative Relationships

Children and young people may not always realise they are in an unhealthy relationship. Here are some warning signs to look out for:

• Changes in behaviour: They may become withdrawn, anxious, or unusually angry.
• Physical injuries: Bruises, cuts, or burns that have no clear explanation.
• Low self-esteem: They might criticise themselves more often than usual.
• Fear of someone specific: They seem scared when someone’s name is mentioned or when that person is around.
• Secretive or defensive behaviour: Hiding their phone or being unwilling to talk about their life.
• Sudden changes in social circles: Spending time with people who seem to have negative influences.
• Unexplained possessions: Expensive items they wouldn’t usually afford, which could indicate exploitation.

Talking About Abuse and Exploitation

Open and honest communication is crucial. Make young people feel safe enough to share their concerns. Start conversations without judgment:

• Use age-appropriate language.
• Stick to simple, clear examples.
• Avoid criticising the young person. Focus on listening.
• Let them know abuse and exploitation are never their fault.

For example, you might say: “Sometimes, people treat others in ways that aren’t kind or fair. If that ever happens to you, you can talk to me about it. I’m here to help.”

Building Trust

Trust is the foundation of any conversation about sensitive issues. A child or young person is more likely to open up if they feel you support and understand them. Ways to build trust include:

• Being approachable and non-judgmental.
• Respecting their feelings and opinions.
• Keeping conversations private, except when safeguarding rules require otherwise.

Explain your role and responsibilities clearly. For instance, let them know that if they tell you something that puts them at risk, you will need to share it with the right people, but it’s for their safety.

Helping Children and Young People Recognise Abuse

Many children and young people may not realise their relationship is abusive or exploitative. To help them recognise this, you can:

Educate them on healthy relationships:

Explain what a respectful and balanced relationship looks like. Healthy relationships have characteristics such as:

• Mutual respect.
• Equality.
• Safe communication.
• Disagreements handled without fear or manipulation.

Discuss what abuse or exploitation looks like:

Give clear examples of harmful behaviours, such as:

• Physical harm (hitting, shoving).
• Emotional abuse (insulting, belittling, or isolating).
• Coercion (making someone do something against their will).

Use scenarios and roleplay:
Create everyday situations to help them identify red flags. For example, ask: “If a friend told you to do something you’re uncomfortable with, what would you do?”

Encouraging Action

Recognising abuse is the first step, but children and young people also need guidance on what to do next.

Provide clear steps they can take:

1. Talk to someone they trust: Encourage them to speak to a parent, teacher, or mentor.
2. Contact support organisations: Share helpline numbers or websites. Examples include Childline (0800 1111) and NSPCC.
3. Leave unsafe situations: Help them understand it’s okay to walk away from harm, when it is safe to do so.
4. Report it: Support them in reporting abuse to the police or social services when needed.

Safety planning:

Create a personalised safety plan with them. Key parts of a safety plan may include:

• Identifying safe adults they can approach for help.
• Keeping important phone numbers saved.
• Practising what they will say when seeking help.

For example: “If you ever feel scared or unsafe, call this number. You don’t have to explain everything; just tell them you need help.”

Reassure them about taking action:

Children and young people might hesitate to act because they feel scared or ashamed. Make sure they understand:

• They did nothing wrong.
• Abuse and exploitation are never deserved.
• There are people ready to help them.

Building Confidence and Self-Esteem

Low self-esteem can make young people more vulnerable to exploitation. Help them rebuild their confidence by:

• Highlighting their strengths and achievements.
• Encouraging hobbies or skills that boost their self-worth.
• Practising assertiveness. Teach them phrases like: “No, I don’t feel comfortable with that,” or “Stop, I need you to listen to me.”

Involving Parents or Carers

If it is safe, involving parents or carers can make a big difference. They are often the ones who spend the most time with the child and can watch for ongoing signs of harm.

Help parents or carers by:

• Explaining the importance of open dialogue.
• Sharing resources on spotting abuse or exploitation.
• Encouraging them to seek support if they feel unsure how to help.

Safeguarding and Professional Responsibilities

When you suspect abuse or exploitation, safeguarding procedures must always be followed. As a professional:

• Record any disclosures or concerns accurately.
• Refer to your organisation’s designated safeguarding lead (DSL).
• Respect confidentiality but share information with authorities when necessary.

Engage with external agencies like police, social services, or charities if appropriate. Remember, safeguarding is a collective responsibility.

Providing Long-Term Support

Recovery from abuse or exploitation can take time. Help young people access long-term support such as:

• Counselling services.
• Support groups for survivors of abuse.
• Educational programmes on building healthy relationships.

Stay consistent in your efforts. Regular check-ins show them you care and are there to help.

Key Support Resources for Children and Young People

Provide young people with contact details for organisations that specialise in helping them:

• Childline: 0800 1111 or www.childline.org.uk
• NSPCC: 0808 800 5000 or www.nspcc.org.uk
• The Mix: 0808 808 4994 or www.themix.org.uk
• YoungMinds: www.youngminds.org.uk (mental health support)

Conclusion

Your role in supporting children and young people involved in abusive or exploitative relationships is vital. Through building trust, teaching them to recognise harm, and guiding them on taking action, you empower them to protect themselves and seek help. By working together with other professionals, parents, and carers, you create a safety net to keep them safe and help them thrive.