3.1 Describe ways that an individual’s own feelings may affect disclosure or reporting of domestic abuse

This guide will help you answer 3.1 Describe ways that an individual’s own feelings may affect disclosure or reporting of domestic abuse.

Many individuals feel that disclosing domestic abuse will lead to negative judgement. This can happen if they think professionals, friends or family will blame them for the situation. If they have been told by the abuser that they are at fault, these feelings may be stronger. Fear of being judged often leads people to stay silent, even when safety is at risk.

A person experiencing abuse may think others will see them as weak or foolish. They may believe people will question their decisions, such as staying in the relationship. These thoughts can stop them from reporting the abuse to authorities, health workers, or social care staff.

This fear can be linked to past experiences. If someone has faced judgement before, they may expect it again. This can be especially true if earlier disclosures were met with disbelief or criticism.

Shame and Embarrassment

Shame is a strong feeling that can prevent disclosure. It is a deep sense of personal failure or dishonour. A person subjected to abuse may feel ashamed about what has happened to them. They may think it reflects badly on them, their family, or their personal choices.

Embarrassment is similar but less intense. It can be a reaction to the idea of other people knowing private details. Reporting abuse often means talking about controlling, violent or humiliating behaviour. This can cause discomfort.

Abuse can involve actions that are sexual or degrading. Talking about these can be very difficult. Embarrassment may be heightened in situations where the victim and the professional are from the same community, or where cultural values make certain topics taboo.

Self-Blame

Many individuals blame themselves for the abuse. This can come from messages the abuser has given them repeatedly. Over time the person may begin to believe these words. They might think they have caused arguments, provoked anger or failed to meet expectations.

When someone feels responsible for the abuse, they rarely see themselves as a victim. They may believe that if they behaved differently, the abuse would stop. This self-blame often prevents them from seeking help. They may feel that their situation is a private matter or that authorities would agree with the abuser.

Self-blame can be particularly strong where the person has low self-esteem. The abuse itself may have worn down their confidence, making them less likely to speak out.

Fear of Not Being Believed

Another major factor is the fear that people will not believe them. This is common when the abuser is well-liked or respected in the community. The victim may think that others will see the abuser’s public image rather than the truth.

If professionals reject or dismiss initial attempts to report, the person may decide not to try again. This fear is stronger if they have previously seen other victims ignored or discredited. Worrying about being viewed as overreacting or lying can make disclosure extremely hard.

Confidence in support services can influence this feeling. A person who trusts the system is more likely to report, while those lacking trust might remain silent.

Love and Emotional Attachment

Domestic abuse does not always end attachment to the abuser. A victim may love the person harming them. They may remember times when the relationship felt good and hope it will return to that state. This emotional attachment can make them try to protect the abuser from legal or social consequences.

Love can lead someone to minimise what is happening. They may believe that reporting the abuse will result in separation and harm to the abuser’s reputation or career. This conflict between feelings and safety can prevent disclosure.

Where family life is involved, strong emotional bonds can be complicated by shared history, children and social ties.

Fear of Retaliation

Disclosure can feel dangerous for some victims. They may fear that the abuser will retaliate. Retaliation could be physical, emotional, financial or social. The victim may believe the abuse will intensify if the abuser finds out they have spoken to authorities or professionals.

Threats often play a central role in controlling victims. The abuser might threaten to harm the victim, children, other relatives or pets. This makes disclosure feel unsafe. Even with legal protection orders, fear of retaliation can remain strong.

Cultural and Social Pressures

Cultural background can shape a victim’s feelings about reporting abuse. In some cultures, family matters are seen as private. Speaking about them outside the family can be viewed as disloyal or dishonourable.

Social pressures may include fear of gossip and damaged reputation. A victim may worry that the community will turn against them. This is especially challenging in close-knit communities where people know each other well.

Religious beliefs may also play a role. Some teachings can be interpreted as encouraging endurance in marriage or discouraging separation. These beliefs can intensify the victim’s reluctance.

Dependency on the Abuser

Dependency can take many forms. A victim may rely on the abuser for money, housing, childcare or immigration status. Fear of losing these supports can be stronger than fear of the abuse itself. The victim may believe they have no alternative means to survive or care for dependents.

Emotional dependency is also possible. This can be built through long-term manipulation and control. A person may feel unable to make decisions or cope without the abuser.

These dependencies can make the idea of reporting abuse feel like risking basic needs.

Protection of Children

Feelings about children can strongly affect disclosure. A victim may fear losing custody if they disclose. They may think authorities will judge them for exposing children to abuse.

Others may fear that reporting will cause the children to be taken into care. This can make them choose silence over what they see as a risk to family unity.

Conversely, the desire to protect children can sometimes encourage disclosure. Yet for many, fear of negative outcomes weighs more heavily.

Feeling Hopeless or Resigned

A victim may feel that nothing will change if they speak up. This comes from previous failed attempts to get help or from situations where the abuser has avoided consequences. Over time they may accept the abuse as part of their life.

Resignation can be linked to depression or emotional exhaustion. Reporting requires energy, motivation and a belief that change is possible. Without these, disclosure is unlikely.

Hopelessness can make any effort to seek help feel pointless. This feeling is a barrier that professionals need to understand.

Lack of Knowledge About Support Services

Some individuals do not know what services can help them. They may believe that only the police deal with abuse, and they might fear criminal action against the abuser. Lack of knowledge about alternative support, such as counselling or refuge accommodation, means they cannot imagine safe options after disclosure.

Misunderstanding the process of reporting can also cause hesitation. People may expect long interrogations or public exposure. Accurate information from trusted sources can remove these fears.

Personal Pride

Personal pride can stop people from asking for help. Admitting abuse can feel like admitting defeat or loss of control. For some, pride is tied to identity and independence. Disclosing abuse may seem to contradict the image they wish to keep.

This can be common where the person has a public role, professional status, or is viewed as strong by others. Protecting self-image can take priority over seeking safety.

Distrust of Authorities

Some victims have had negative experiences with authorities. Past encounters with police, social services or healthcare workers may have been unpleasant. These experiences can cause feelings of distrust.

Where discrimination or bias has occurred in the past, victims may expect judgement or poor treatment. This fear can be stronger in minority groups or where there is a history of poor relations between the community and authorities.

Trauma and Psychological Impact

Domestic abuse can cause trauma. Trauma affects thought processes, emotions and decision-making. Some victims may struggle to organise their thoughts or plan actions. Others may block out memories or try to avoid triggers, which can include talking about the abuse.

Anxiety and depression can lower confidence and make talking about abuse overwhelming. Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can involve avoidance behaviours, which stop people discussing the events causing distress.

Mixed Feelings About Reporting

Victims may have conflicting emotions about taking action. One moment they might want the abuse to stop, and the next they might feel loyalty or hope. These mixed feelings slow down disclosure. They can lead to changes in decision from day to day.

Mixed feelings can be worsened by influence from others. Friends or relatives might urge them to protect the abuser or keep quiet.

Final Thoughts

Feelings play a powerful role in shaping whether an individual discloses or reports domestic abuse. Fear, shame, love, dependence, pride, cultural pressures, distrust and hopelessness all act as barriers. Each feeling can appear alone or in combination, creating resistance to speaking out. These feelings are not signs of weakness. They are responses to a harmful and controlling situation.

Understanding these emotions is important for anyone working in health and social care. It allows for more sensitive support and better planning of interventions. Creating a safe, non-judgemental environment can reduce the emotional barriers victims face. Trust and respectful communication can help people feel more able to disclose abuse and get the help they need.